It’s the Rule

Some of us remember having rules everywhere.  I recall rules at home (no spitting, no hitting, close the door behind you, etc.), church (be quiet and listen to the preacher, read/study your Sunday School lesson, bow your head during prayers, etc.), Vacation Bible School (don’t let the flag touch the ground, memorize bible verses, etc.), school (no talking unless you raise your hand first, no running inside, respect the property of others, etc.).  Think about how chaotic the highways would be if there were not,”rules of the road!”

The preschool years are when we begin learning that there are rules that family members are expected to live by.  Are you making the effort to teach your wee ones the rules of your home?  What rules are important to you in your home?  Do your children know how to abide by the rules?  Are there consequences for breaking a rule?  Do your kids know what those consequences are?

Once your preschooler is old enough to understand simple rules, he is old enough to begin living by them.  I recommend making a poster on which you list several rules for your home.  Ex:  1) Be kind.  This will cover many things.  No hitting, no spitting, no throwing things inside.  No calling people ugly names, etc.  2) Put things back where they belong.  That can include trash in the trash can, books on the shelf, toys in the toy box, coats & shoes in the closet, dishes in the sink, etc. 3) Everyone helps.  Chores can be very simple for the youngest child:  Closing the door behind you, bringing in a grocery item. An older child will be able to wash the bowl and give a pet fresh water.

The rules need to be important to the adults in the home so that everyone buys into them.  You should be consistent in having your youngsters abide by your house rules.  Once you make your poster (use pictures instead of words, i.e. a picture of a trash can, a closet, or a book shelf to demonstrate rule #2), show your preschooler, as young as a year, the poster and point to the poster and say, “Look, Peter, these are our rules.”  Indicate the picture of the book shelf and tell him, “This means we must always put things back where they belong.”  I can’t tell you how many times I heard my mother say, “A place for everything, and everything in its place.”  And I learned its true.

Consistency is the key when it comes to making rules stick.  Be vigilant about noticing an infraction and deal with it immediately.  Be sure your child knows what will happen when he breaks a rule.  Give your child a week or two to get used to the rules.  Ask, “What rule did you just break?”  Remind him that in another week, he would have had consequences for that.  Perhaps most importantly, praise your child for following rules.  Great job, son, you were being kind when you helped your sister up when she fell.  You may want to keep track of each time your child remembers a rule and provide a sticker.  He can earn a reward when he gets enough stickers.  Raising a child respectful of rules will be YOUR reward.  You can do it, and so can he!

©2012 Brenda Holland-Robinson