Terrific Two’s

I do think toddlers are terrific.  That doesn’t mean that I don’t recognize how difficult a two-year-old can be at times.  If she were not, there would probably be something wrong.

When you let her know it is time for bed, and she looks you in the eye, puts her hands on her little hips and says, in her most determined voice, “No! I don’t want to,” what are you, as a parent, to do?

First of all, be grateful that your child is on target developmentally.  It is time for her to separate from you a bit.  She is learning that she has a mind of her own and can use it to her advantage.  Instead of getting into a tug of war with your little soldier, try agreeing with her.  Let her know you are aware that she wants to continue playing.

Or begin in a totally different way.  You might give your child a short warning before having her end her play.  “OK, Mommy is going to clean up the dishes and then its time for a bath and a book.”

This will give your wee one a heads-up as to what is coming next.  It will also give her a fun activity to which she can look forward.  She may even head for the book shelf and pick a favorite in preparation.

On the occasions when heels become dug-in regarding getting ready for bed or dressed to go somewhere, you may need to gently pick up the child and head for the bathroom.  Give her words for her feelings, “You are angry that you must go to bed when you want to play.”  When things settle down a bit, she can be told you understand she wasn’t ready to stop playing.

Make an effort to end a bath session with a fun and relaxing activity.  Reading a book or two is a great one.  Rocking and cuddling while talking about the day is another.  Discuss in simple words the routine of the day:  breakfast, brushing teeth, getting dressed, playing, having lunch, nap, snack, supper, play, bath, snuggle time, bed.

Most two’s will be yawning and rubbing eyes by the end of a second book.  Music is another good “sleeping pill”.  My youngest reminded me recently that she still loves to listen to Rod McKuen’s album “The Sea” that she remembered going to sleep to so often growing up.

Don’t forget to provide your wee one with lots of choices throughout the day so she feels she has some control over her life.  Let it be her choice if she wears her red or her blue shorts, uses her green or orange cereal bowl, has milk or juice at lunch, naps on her bed or on a mat on the floor, etc.  Not only will she be more willing to cooperate with you, you will also be teaching her to make decisions.  It’s worth a try.  Stay positive.  Smile.