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Stump County Stomp

   Written by on September 12, 2013 at 12:37 pm

We were down to the Poore School (pronounced Po-school) watching some of the chaps on the playground. There was one big kid picking on some of the others. We were real proud when one little goofy kid stepped up and said, “I’m gonna draw a red line in the sand. Iffen you step over it you’ll be sorry.”

stump countyWell, that bully stepped over that line which wasn’t really red by the way. Why the heck would you call a line in the sand a red line anyway? That goofy kid started back-steppin’ and dancin’ and sayin’ it wasn’t his line and somebody else drew that line and somebody else was going to do some butt-kickin’ and he’d do it himself just as soon as somebody gave him permission.

If we hadn’t stepped in it could have gotten ugly. That goofy kid wasn’t upset at all. He said he plans on being president of the whole dadgum U S of A some day and he’s just practicing.

Ever’body knows there ain’t but one way to stop a bully and that’s to kick his butt. We went down to the Yak-n-Snack Restaurant to drink Big Orange Soda Pops and discuss it. There were three proposals offered. One was “just let them fight it out.” That one was proposed by the folks who were bullies in school. Another group thought it was best to ignore it and let it resolve itself. Those were the folks who weren’t bullies AND weren’t bullied in school. The third group thought the kids should get together and kick butt. Those were the kids who were bullied in school.

 

 

It seems like we are seeing the same thing in National news. The first problem is nobody is sure which side is responsible for the bullying. The second is you don’t warn the bully. He knows what he is doing is wrong. He doesn’t care what we think and he thinks he is going to get away with it.

Iffen we are going to take on a bully we should just whap him upside the head without warning. Congress and President Yo Mama should have had some top secret meetings. They should have decided where the line was and if they wanted to what color they wanted to call it. Then when that Dick Tater guy crossed it, Wham!

First off you need to decide if a fight is worth it. Then you need to decide if you can win. Then you need to get it over with. All-in, all-out and all-over. This chest-beating and macho stuff may make you feel good but it don’t win no fights.

That’s kid stuff at the playground. “We gonna fight but no hair-pullin’, no bitin’, no fists, and no hittin’ in the face.”  That ain’t a fight, that’s play school.

That’s another thing: there ain’t no such thing as a limited response. You’re either fightin’ or ya ain’t. Iffen ya gonna fight you need to fight all out and you need to win.

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