Short Stories for Summer

   Written by on June 22, 2017 at 10:03 am

logo- community news & viewsThis reporter knows how busy everyone is during the summer with gardens, canning, vacations, etc.  Here are a few short stories that will “tickle your fancy” when you have the time to read.

A lawyer who had a wife and 12 children needed to move because his rental agreement was terminated by the owner who wanted to reoccupy the house.  But, he was having a lot of difficulty finding a new house.  When he said that he had 12 children, no one would rent a home to him because they felt that the children would destroy the place.

He couldn’t say that he had no children because he couldn’t lie.  We all know lawyers cannot and do not lie!  So, he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 11 of their kids.  He took the remaining child with him to see rental homes with the real estate agent.

He loved one of the homes and the price was right.  The agent asked, “How many children do you have?” He answered, “Twelve.” The agent looked at the one child and asked, “Where are the others?”  The lawyer, with a sincere look of sadness, answered, “They’re in the cemetery with their mother.”

MORAL:  It’s not necessary to lie; one only has to choose the right words.  Don’t forget most politicians are, unfortunately, lawyers!!

This is about computers that I think most will enjoy.  This reporter can relate and think you will too if you are or are not computer savvy!  It’s comforting to know that others feel as I sometimes do about computers.

At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.”

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash…twice a day.

Every time the lines were painted in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

Occasionally your car would die on the road for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all windows, shut off the car, restart it, and then reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.

Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only five percent of the roads.

The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single “This Car Has Performed an Illegal Operation” warning light.

The airbag system would ask “Are you sure?” before deploying.

Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

Every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

You’d have to press the ‘Start’ button to turn the engine off.

A Minute with God:

With what is going on in the world these days, Heaven could end up a ghost town.

MY NAME IS GOD. You hardly have time for Me. I love you and will always bless you. I am always with you. I need you to spend 60 seconds of your time with Me today.  Don’t pray, just praise.

Why are prayers getting shorter but bars & clubs are enlarging and expanding? Why is it so easy to worship a celebrity but very difficult to walk with Me? When one door closes, I open two more. If I have opened doors for you, give that message to others & bless them for Me.

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