Pesky Leaves

There was frost on the kudzu Monday morning. Already! A little early to my way of thinking, but I grabbed a heavier jacket for New Dog’s walk around town and off we went.

It’s raking season already, too. Not my favorite thing to do, but when it’s warm outside I really don’t mind too much. In honor of the season I made a small purchase last week that will, if nothing else, save The Neighbor some time and aggravation. I bought a leaf blower from a gentleman who promised it had only been used “once or twice.” The offer emerged in the middle of another conversation on the street uptown and I jumped right on it because the leaf blower I used to own somehow ended up in Florida. Long story with no reasonable explanation.

Anyway, it seemed that this gentleman was able to give me a choice of leaf blowers when I went to his house. He had two displayed on his front walk and told me to take my pick. Well, the one being the lightest weight and bright green and yellow – to match the Deere lawn mower, you know – I chose the one made by Weedeater as opposed to the other orange and black one that was, frankly, a tad big and menacing.

The deal was struck, with a couple of additions. This leaf blower is electric – my choice ‘cause what do I know about small engines and mixing potions to make them run right? “Throw in that mile-long orange extension cord and it’s a deal!” He did.

But wait! There’s more!

“Follow me,” the young man said and off we went across the yard to a metal storage shed out back. He wrenched the door open, bent over and started gathering up what looked like pieces of that hard black plastic pipe (but smaller in diameter) you attach to a downspout to direct rain water away from the house. Three, four, maybe five pieces of this stuff were handed to me. Then came a piece with a smaller pipe attached, and that attachment had the approximate curve of a candy cane on the end. “You can clean your gutters with this,” he pronounced. What a deal!

Well, when I got all this paraphernalia home, I soon began to realize the most likely reason that this leaf blower had only been used once or twice. The fan-shaped piece that screws directly to the blower was simple enough. Good for blowing leaves off the front porch and grass off the stone sidewalk after I cut grass. But obviously all those additional pieces of black pipe had a purpose or they wouldn’t have been included. I laid them all out on the patio table and began to look from end to end – what would screw into which end of which one, and, wait, doesn’t that need to be on the end? Shouldn’t that crook fit over into the gutter? I can’t hold this machine that high! Try another piece!

Thank goodness a cooler head prevailed. Mrs. Neighbor jumped right in and began twirling black pipe right along with me. “Try this!” “Won’t work. It’s the same size as that one.” “Take that one off and turn it around.” Finally, we found two extension pieces that attached nicely and Mrs. Neighbor suggested we make sure that this demon machine would indeed blow the leaves out of the gutter.

In typical Keystone Kop fashion, the predictable happened. Mrs. Neighbor held the blower up off the back steps and I guided the curved pipe into the gutter. “Let ‘er rip!” she yelled, or something to that effect. Yes, my friends, the blower left that gutter clean as a whistle while we, on the other hand, were showered with a deluge of leaves and cold water.

Right now, the blower is resting inside on the back porch. The pieces of black extension pipe are all laid out on the patio table, some attached to others. Believe me, before they are disassembled for more expedient storage there will be some colorful painting done from one piece to another so I don’t have to twirl and spin and experiment any more. I’ll be sure which piece attaches to which piece. I hope.

All this for The Neighbor who had been graciously cleaning the gutters for me. Like I told him, “You can’t do a good job without the right tools for the job.”