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Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

   Written by on February 5, 2015 at 2:26 pm

Henry David Thoreau, 1851, “Nothing is so much to be feared as fear.”

Franklin D. Roosevelt, 1933, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Martin Luther King, 1968, “We have nothing to fear but fear itself.”

These men warn us not to let fear overwhelm us.  So what is fear?  Fear is a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, or pain, whether the threat is real or imagined.

logo - gowinFear can be a useful emotion.  Our natural fight-or-flight response programs our bodies to release adrenaline.  Adrenaline heightens our physical reaction ability.  This can be very useful in a situation of real danger.

However, what about the situation where the threat is more imagined than real?  There are times these fears control our lives.  Can we overcome our fears?  Yes, overcoming fears is a learned skill.  Have you heard the phrase “facing your fears”?  Facing your fears means that you have come to an understanding of your fears and you have learned to put your fear in proper perspective.  Here are several techniques designed to help you control your fears.

Understand your fears.  In a recent Gallup poll the top ten fears were: terrorist attacks, spiders, death, being a failure, war, criminal violence, being alone, the future, and public speaking.  The web is a great place to read how others handle a similar fear.  Also, keep a journal about your fears; learn to identify what is a trigger to your fear.  Understanding your fear will help you control these emotions.

Don’t avoid your fear.  We, generally, try to avoid fearful things.  Before I go any further, what I am about to talk about should only be used with certain fears.  If your fear is of poisonous snakes for example, please skip this paragraph.  Systematic desensitization is a behavioral modification technique used to help you find ways to face your fears.  Start small.  Then in small ways increase your exposure to your fear.  If your fear is going out in public, you start by going outside, then walking to the corner, shop in a small store, and work your way up to shopping at Walmart.  A recommendation, have someone who is trained in this technique to help you build your steps.

Don’t over analyze.  It is very easy to fall into the pattern of thinking about situations and coming up with every bad thing that can happen.  What if I decide to ride the bus today and the bus driver has a heart attack and the bus runs off the road and catches on fire … I think you get the picture.  Don’t over analyze.  Yes, there are always bad things that happen in life but try to stay in touch with the most likely situation.

So What?  When you find yourself building up fears by playing the What If game, make sure to ask, “So what?”  So what if I go to the bank, ask the teller a question and she laughs at me.  So what?  You can always laugh back.

Stay positive.  Reframe your fearful thoughts to positive thoughts.  In three years, I will graduate from college and I know that I will get a job teaching.  Instead of, in three years the economy is going to be in the pits and I just know I will never get a job.  What we say to ourselves is the outcome toward which we work.

Stay connected.  Build a support network.  Having someone that keeps you accountable as well as celebrates your success is a great way to support your efforts.

Releasing your fears can be very liberating.  There is no time like the present to start; don’t wait.  The longer you wait, the more engrained the fears become and the harder it will become to free yourself from your fears.  Take the first step to move through your fear.  You can do it!

For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.  (Isaiah 41:13)

Cheryl Gowin, and Dennis Gowin, Hope for Tomorrow Counseling Center.  Contact us with your feedback, comments, issues, or questions at 434-808-2637.

About Cheryl & Dennis Gowin

Cheryl Gowin, Counselor and Dennis Gowin, Director of Discovery Counseling Center. Contact us with your feedback, comments, issues or questions at 434-808-2426 or dgowin@discoverycounseling.org.

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