Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart

The headline questions “Are we raising an ungrateful generation?”  Does the millennial generation just expect stuff?  Is being ungrateful limited to the “younger” generation?  Does it matter if we are grateful or not?

Gratitude is an appreciation for what we have, both tangible and intangible; it is the means by which we say thanks and the process through which we see the goodness in others or to a higher power.  N.T. Wright asks us if looking at the life of Jesus, seeing the love of God where He did for us what we could not do, we have a sense of astonished gratitude.

Expressing gratitude is not limited to the present.  We can be thankful for our past memories, for what we have in the present, and for the future by maintaining a hopeful and optimistic attitude.

Research shows that people who incorporate gratitude into their lives are happier, feel more positive, appreciate experiences more, have better health, have the ability to handle adversity and have healthier relationships.  Yes, the research supports the benefits of a grateful heart.

In one study, participants weekly wrote on an assigned topic.  Group A wrote about things for which they were grateful that week.  Group B wrote about daily irritations.  Group C wrote about events with no emphasis on being positive or negative.  At the end of the study, the Group A felt better about their lives, had fewer doctor visits and even exercised more than the other groups.

A second study found that people, who wrote a letter of gratitude to someone, had a significant increase in happiness.  This impact was greater than from any other intervention studied.

In another study, married couples who daily expressed gratitude to their partner improved their relationships.  The Wharton School found that employees told thank-you by their managers worked harder.  A group of fundraisers, divided into two groups; one-half received positive feedback, the other half received no feedback.  The following week the positive feedback group made 50% more fundraising calls.

 “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously.  And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”  Ralph Waldo Emerson

Gratitude is a way to appreciate what we have instead of reaching for something new or thinking we can’t feel satisfied until all our needs are met.  Believe it or not, we can build gratitude; it may feel forced at first but with practice, it will become part of our nature.  Here are some ideas.

Thank you notes.  Yes, this can be electronic but take time to say thanks even for little things.  Start the habit of sending at least one thank you note (email or text if you like) a week to someone who has had an impact on your life.

A gratitude journal.  Every day write down things people have done for which you are thankful.  Small actions count; someone let you go first at the bank, handed you a pen or let you take the cart at the grocery story.

Count your blessings.  Set a specific time each week to go back to your gratitude journal and count the number of items for which you are thankful.

A blessing box.  Create a box where everyone in the family can write a thankful note.  Put the box in a central place.  Encourage everyone to add a note daily; simple things like a nice sunny day, an unexpected call from an old friend, laughter, or the fun of watching the dog run after a squirrel.  Set a time to let each person read one of the notes.  This gives everyone in the family the chance to pay attention to God’s presence in small happenings in the day –

Pray.  As Maya Angelou said, “Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer.”

 William Arthur Ward asks: “God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today.  Have you used one to say thank you? ”

Give thanks in all circumstances; 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Cheryl Gowin and Dennis Gowin, Hope for Tomorrow Counseling Center.  Contact us with your feedback, comments, issues, or questions at 434-808-2637.