Gentle Parenting Month Ten

We are quickly drawing to the end of our year of becoming a gentler parent.  June was the month to begin laughing more with our young children.  This month’s goal is to make more of an effort to “build” with our wee one.

At an extremely young age, many infants learn about cause and effect when you stack a few blocks and she bumps them over.  Not only do they make a big noise when they fall, but parents react with smiles and laughter.  After a short time of restacking the blocks, the little princess becomes expert at knocking them over…often before you get them all stacked again.

As a baby gets older, the “building” becomes her own creation. She now knows about cause and effect (when I push on the blocks, they fall over and make lots of noise), but she must learn how to place one block on top of another, then take her hand away without knocking them over. Many young babies already have that “I do it me” attitude, so you will want to observe her as she tries, encourage her to try again, use words to tell her what she is doing, “You are trying to get that block to stay on top of the other one” or “The red block fell when you tried to put the blue one on top of it.”

Ask her what happened when she put the yellow block on top of the red one. Encourage her to “practice.”  Tell her you will practice with her if she wants. You want her to have critical thinking skills.  Instead of telling her to put the biggest block on the bottom, ask her if she thinks the blocks will stay up better if she stacks them in another way.  Accept whatever she does, even if she lines them up horizontally.  Tell her she learned a new way to play with her blocks.

In my preschool family day care I had a sweet little girl who tended to wake before all of the other children had gotten to sleep.  I made a point of putting several learning toys in her bed once she was asleep in the hope that she would remain quiet for a while longer.  She showed quite an interest in the nesting toys one day, so I made a point of placing those in her bed each day along with books and other things.  When she awoke, she’d immediately begin trying to get them nested. She spent lots of time trying over and over to get them all to fit. By the third day, she would pick up the smallest cup, sit it in the next bigger size, pick them both up and place them in the next and so on. The big smile and look of pride and satisfaction on her face was thrilling for her as well as for me.

Her interest in this activity made me think about other things I had that I could make available to her that would build on her new skill.  She got measuring spoons and cups, stacking rings, different sized blocks, etc. I didn’t talk to her too much in order to not disturb the still sleeping children, but also to give her time to think about what she was doing. She would make a discovery and would look at me. I’d smile and nod my head and she would return that big bright smile and get back to her play.  Observing her as she played and built with those toys gave me insight on how she learned.  She liked hands-on activities, lots of time to figure things out for herself, and to know that I was there with her as she learned, but didn’t give her too much direction.

As your child grows, you will be able to plan activities that you can do together.  I recall putting together cereal box toys with my son.  I would read the directions and he would follow.  He would sometimes want to figure the tough things out for himself, but would also ask for help as needed.  Have fun as you build together.  Happy Gentle Parenting!

© 2015 Brenda Holland-Robinson